cognitive distortions

I've started to notice negative self talk I have with myself when I'm alone. I tend to leave interactions happy but after spending time alone quickly turn my memory of them into a negative mush. I told my therapist about this and he said it's something called cognitive distortions which can occur when someone has been traumatized.  I notice them after work or even in planning future events. For example, I'd like to host a party with some co-workers and friends. The first thought that comes to mind about said party is that no one will have a good time and I will be judged for it. I really just want to do it to get over this fear and self-doubt. 
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my role

  I'm writing this for myself so that I remember. You are part of a clog of things that make New York City what it is. That is not an easy task. It's impressive that I got to this stage. Obviously, i'm still an intern and don't know what being a full-on agent is like but i've been given a lot of TRUST and responsibility. In one of the greatest cities on earth. I have a talent, it's innate and it kinda makes all the missing pieces fall into place. 


CEO's understand psychology, they understand people, it's a gift. It sucked because you have to unlearn a lot of things but once you do it all makes sense.


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