cognitive distortions

I've started to notice negative self talk I have with myself when I'm alone. I tend to leave interactions happy but after spending time alone quickly turn my memory of them into a negative mush. I told my therapist about this and he said it's something called cognitive distortions which can occur when someone has been traumatized.  I notice them after work or even in planning future events. For example, I'd like to host a party with some co-workers and friends. The first thought that comes to mind about said party is that no one will have a good time and I will be judged for it. I really just want to do it to get over this fear and self-doubt. 
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Oct 29

 I'm having a mini panic attack, it started when I noticed the funds in my bank account. I often get a feeling of despair when I think of money but this time the feeling has persisted long and has led to lots of spiraling thoughts that I can't seem to shake. 


I just want to sleep but my brain has painted a very gross picture of the world in my mind and it's left me feeling hopeless. I feel like if I ask for help from my parents I'm hurting them. I want to do it all on my own. 


Thinking about money makes me scared, distressed, and hopeless. 


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